Så prøver vi {{forumTopicSubject}}

Ja, nu er jeg jo nyt medlem i gruppen, så må hellere bruge den til noget

Har skrevet en lille del af min første historie i lang tid. Faktisk første historie siden 2004. Så vil gerne bede om lidt konstruktiv kritik, og ellers jeres generelle mening.

Det er fantasy, og på engelsk.

_____________________________________________

My name is Crosphór. I’m part human, part dragon. And if that alone wasn’t enough to make me stand out in a crowd, I am also the heir to the throne of Osnádúrtha. At least, I would be if not for the fact that my younger brother is pure dragon. Well, younger half-brother.
My mother, the Queen of Osnádúrtha, had a fling with a human in her youth. That was before she became queen, of course. But then, after ascending the throne, and having married my step-father, the great Red, Siúil Lasair, she gave birth to my brother, Mac Lasair.
As Osnádúrtha has always been ruled by dragons, the mightiest of magical beings, the fact that my younger brother was pureblood placed him ahead of me in the line of succession, even though I am 200 years older than him.
As such, I do not mind not being next in line for the throne. I value my freedom much too high for that. Out of gratitude to my brother, however, simply for him being born, I offered to step in as the Captain of his personal guard. Even being a true-blooded dragon, he would need it. Especially in the early years of his life.

That was 1000 years ago. My mother has now ruled Osnádúrtha for 999 years. In one year, it will be time for my brother to ascend the throne, and assume the responsibility of being a monarch.
Tradition states that a ruler can only occupy the throne for 1000 years. Dragons, being the long-lived race that they are, have a tendency of becoming too set in their ways. After all, unless slain in combat, or otherwise killed, they do live forever.
As such, to ensure that we do not inhibit ourselves by not adapting to an everchanging world, it was decided long ago that every 1000 years, a new ruler is needed.

My mother’s reign has passed relatively peacefully. But now, the inhabitants of the Troll lands to the south of us have begun massing their armies. I know not for what particular purpose. But I do know that when the Trolls ready for war, no good ever comes of it.